- To write with a broken pencil is pointless.
- There was once a cross-eyed teacher who couldn't control his pupils.
- A rule of grammar: double negatives are a no-no.
- A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it was a weapon of math disruption.
- He said I was average - but he was just being mean.
- Math teachers have lots of problems.
- It wasn't school John disliked it was just the principal of it.
- He wears glasses during math because it improves divison.
- When the electricity went off during a storm at a school the students were de-lighted.
- What did the triangle say to the circle? You're so pointless.
- Skipping school to bungee jump will get you suspended.
- Decimals have a point.
- I've failed the mathematics test so many times I lost count.
- When fish are in schools they sometimes take debate.
- Mathematics teachers call retirement 'the aftermath'.
- I'm bad at math, so the equation 2n+2n is 4n to me.
- Teachers who take class attendance are absent-minded.
- I always prayed before my trigonometry tests. I was hoping for a sine from above.
- Studying fungus is a way to mold young minds.
- Little Jimmy told his teacher he never saw a humming bird but he had watched a spelling bee.
- Old math teachers never die, they just become irrational.
- We'll never run out of math teachers because they always multiply.
- A small boy went to the counter to pay for his lunch but he was a little short.
- On the shelf there are ten math books, five geography books, and the rest is history.
- Sometimes a pencil sharpener is needed in order to make a good point.
- He became a math teacher due to some prime factors.
- The girls swim team has a new coach who acts like she knows everything. Her name is Claire Buoyant.
- In equations with square numbers I can never find the root of the problem.
- The answers for the geology test were written in stone.
- His qualifications as a math teacher didn't add up.
- The arrogant maths teacher finally ate a slice of humble pie.
- The maths teacher was a good dancer - he had algorithm.
- The man who bought too much graphing paper didn't know where to draw the line.
- The science teachers broke up because there was no chemistry between them.
- A student limped into class with a lame excuse.
- The English Teacher felt odd after being fired: it was post-grammatic stress disorder.
- The calculus teacher tried to keep his students on task, but the class discussion kept going off on tangents.
- His penmanship is certainly nothing to write home about.
- Our social studies teacher says that her globe means the world to her.
- I met a math professor who has 12 children - she really knows how to multiply.
- When she made Mario puzo's books required reading for her class, she made him an author they couldn't refuse.
- Eating too many snacks when studying for a test is called cramming.
- Two friends took ropes to school so that they could skip out.
- Old school principals never die, they just lose their faculties.
- Teaching history is old news.
- The number 10210 is too intense.
- Old teachers never die they just lose their class.
- The students on the top floor of the school were upper class.
- Math class is full of drama. There are so many problems to work out.
- The teacher asked a question and the students were all up in arms.
- I need to do my philosophy homework but I just Kant.
- Retired teachers are classless.
- An English teacher, who was dreadfully afraid of insects, while on a picnic screamed like a little girl when he saw there was an antonym.
- The school had a door made of iron. That was why it was called the school of hard knocks.
- A teacher used his index finger to ask a lot of pointed questions.
- Why did the Latin student end up being a bachelor? Because every time he was asked to conjugate, he declined.
- A bartender was summoned to court with a subpoena colada.
- English teachers can keep a class Spell bound.
- Some students concentrate lesson history and moron themselves.
- A not-very-good art teacher was good only at drawing blank faces.
- A teacher having a tough time longs for the end of the school daze.
- When you use glue in class it paste to be careful.
- Throwing trash on the street is litter-ly illegal.
- The math teacher was an exponent of his own powers.
- A lawyer was defending a math teacher. He had to sum up.
- I stink at fractions. I'm not half as good as the class.
- He was late for school until a spider dropped on his ankle and then he decided to shake a leg.
- The first order of priority in hiring math majors is get them to sine on the dotted line
- Those with scissors shouldn't use cutting words.
- Finding area is an integral part of calculus.
- Using fingers to count is a digit-al calculator.
- England doesn't have a kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool.
- He dressed poorly in grade eight. The next year he dressed to the nines.
- Teachers' hands are usually chalk-full.
- The sign language teacher was very good with her hands.
- He asked his teacher if rust came from rot iron.
- The boy's guitar teacher helped him pick up his skills.
- I raised my intelligence using my cranium.
- England doesn't have a kindney bank, but it does have a Liverpool.
- A noun and a verb were dating but they broke up because the noun was too possesive.
- I don't think I need a spine. It's holding me back.
- The little old woman who lived in a shoe wasn't the sole owner - there were strings attached.
- We were so poor when I was growing up we couldn't even afford to pay attention.
- The guitarist passed out on stage, he must have rocked himself to sleep.
- He avoided funerals because he was not a mourning person.
- A criminal's best asset is his lie ability.
- The indencisve rower couldn't choose either oar.
- A horse is a very stable animal.
- When the new hive is complete, bees have a house swarming party.
- She had a photographic memory but never developed it.